Many couples don’t get help because they have the wrong idea about mental health help. A therapist’s direct questions often appear as if they’re taking sides, but they’re not.
A qualified therapist listens to both sides of your relationship story. This is where the real and temporarily uncomfortable work begins to help you heal from:
- Loss of Intimacy: Working to help you restore the spark so you stop being roommates and return to being partners.
- Trust Issues: Addressing infidelity and other betrayals so people can heal and restore their relationships.
- Prevent Separation or Divorce: Seeking help from a qualified therapist is your best chance of staying together.
At Therapy By You, we ask the hard questions so couples can make positive changes in their relationship. Start improving your partnership by calling (248) 919-8092 or contacting us online!
What You Can Expect from Couples Therapy
This therapy can be difficult and even painful at times. This is the hard truth that some people might not want to hear, even though they need to listen.
During these tough moments, it’s easy for some people to believe their therapist is “against them.” Their anger is a common defense mechanism that makes it easy to avoid facing uncomfortable truths.
If you really want to save your relationship, turn off your panic button and see these challenges as an opportunity for growth:
1. “Can You Live With It?”
To someone who’s upset with their partner’s behavior, this statement can appear like the therapist is “taking sides.” Actually, the question is an attempt to see if the problem can be fixed or not.
If they resist the urge to get upset, answering this question can help couples learn a lot about each other. The goal is to help you better understand what can change and what you’ll have to accept if you want to stay together.
2. Seeing Your Own Mistakes
When you argue at home, it’s easy to feel like the hero and see your partner as the villain. In therapy, the therapist rotates the mirror so you have to look at your own mistakes.
For some people, this process can be extremely uncomfortable.
If you want couples therapy to work, you have to be able to see how your actions are contributing to the problem. While initially uncomfortable, this can be a huge help for you and your relationship.
3. The Truth Is in the Middle
It’s common for each person to want the therapist to believe their version of events. A good therapist knows that there are three sides to a story: Person A’s side, Person B’s side, and the truth.
In most cases, the clinician will safely test their clients’ limits by challenging both partners. The goal is to get each of them to see how their choices affect the relationship.
4. Don’t Quit When It Gets Hard
It’s not uncommon for some people to feel like getting up and storming out of the therapist’s office. Those who resist this urge are the ones who benefit most from therapy.
Therapy can uncover uncomfortable truths about people and their partners. Although it can be difficult, it’s best to stay in the room even when you feel uncomfortable.
Therapy By You: Restore Your Relationship with Couples Therapy
Temporary issues don’t have to mark the end of your connection. At Therapy By You, our licensed therapist, Mike Shihadeh, identifies the internal friction and provides real help and guidance to overcome it.
Mike helps you and your partner face difficult truths and identify the hidden emotions behind your conflicts. Instead of “taking sides,” he’ll help both of you work together and have the best chance of staying together.
Stop struggling and get the help you need to restore the health and happiness to your relationship. Enjoy a more harmonious partnership by calling (248) 919-8092 or contacting us online!
